Hey everyone. I need help. I’ve misplaced my memory and I can’t find it. I used to always have it with me, rapidly spewing obscure facts and actually remembering the word, apparition. More and more though, I misplace it, leave it charging on the kitchen counter. Or I’ve stuck it in the fridge, instead of the cupboard.
For the most part, it’s the steel trap it once was: Oh, yes you mean Judith Light from Who’s the Boss, which aired from 1984 to 1992. She later went on to star in Ugly Betty and Law and Order: Special Victims Unit, but I will always fondly remember her as Angela Bower on that quirky sitcom.
But then there are times this happens:
-Where are those you know – thingy boppers?
You mean scissors…
-Hold on, did I just apply conditioner? Or accidentally shampoo my hair twice? Let me feel it… yep, shampooed it twice. Oops.
I need to stop zoning out so much, they’re obviously very different bottles.
-Oh, I know I’ve seen that actor before… his name is on the tip of tongue… it begins with a D, no a K… I’m not Googling it. I’m not. I’m going to figure this out… A week later as I’m washing the dishes: Russell Crowe. His name is Russell Crowe. I knew I didn’t need you, Google.
It just came to me…
-Wait. Who won the last Super bowl? I’m pretty sure I watched it. (It was the Baltimore Ravens. I had to ask my husband)
This is probably why I don’t remember. Who cares if neither of your teams are playing?
-Wait. Who won best video on the MTV VMAs last year? Mmmm. I stopped watching that years ago, you know when MTV actually played music and CDs were primary mode of acquiring music. (It was Rihanna in case you’re wondering)
Yes, it’s a Bon Jovi CD.
-And lastly: blankly stares at the word “hello” – is that spelled right? That can’t be spelled right. But spellcheck hasn’t underlined it. I know, I’ll paste it into Google and see if Google does that did you mean … thing. Hmm. I guess it is spelled right. Weird.
Yep, Google has confirmed it. That’s how you spell hello.
I’ve tried not to let it bother me. I chalk it up to getting older or the fact that you can only cram so much information into your brain before it starts auto-deleting or at least auto-archiving. Then there are all the distractions competing for my brain’s attention.
And let’s face it, a twelve year old has way less to remember. Their personal history and first hand experience of the world is much more brief. They have only been through two presidents and 100 versions of Microsoft Windows. They’ve never used a computer that just had the flashing green cursor thingy.
And of course they can remember the names of all 7 dwarves, they haven’t been forced to remember what Avogadro’s number is or been asked to memorize all the muscles in the human forearm (my favorite is extensor pollicis brevis) or had to program a VCR (Damn you SP setting. You got me more than once. And now I’m left with the first two hours of Stephen King’s “It” on one tape and a partially recorded televised version of Poltergeist on a another tape).
And now I feel bad for all those 90 year olds I harassed when I worked in the hospital, asking them what year it was or who the current president was. Bugging them about how long they’ve been married and the names of all their kids. Jeez. I can barely remember what year it is.
Wait. It’s 2013. Right? I’m not going to Google it… I’m not.
OMG! You have just described my life! Hilarious…and so true.
I have also used that one about how we have soooo much more information to store than young people….and, I am NOT going to Google that yet…Sure enough, the info shows up a couple of hours later.
And here’s another one: our minds are like our computers. The “memory” can get full and needs to be cleared out before it can retrieve anything else. A disk defragmentation, perhaps?
It’s always nice to know other people have the same memory hiccups. I’ve even noticed some of my friends my age having little slips every now and then.
I just use it as an excuse to take a break and do some, as you put it, disk defragmentation 🙂
Spot on with this post. I have done all of that stuff too.
Glad to know it’s not just me 🙂
I was watching an interview with Ringo Starr. The interviewer asked him the name of his first drum set. Ringo couldn’t come up with it. He tried and tried and finally said, it’s there, it just has to ‘bubble up to the surface’. He went on with the interview and sure enough, about 10 minutes later in the interview it came to him. I like that, the information just has to ‘bubble up to the surface’ because it is just so buried under so much other stuff in there.
That’s another way to look at it. It just has to fight its way to the top!
I have definitely run the washing machine and forgotten to put in soap. And that’s the first thing I remember that I forgot….
Yeah, I think you just do things on autopilot sometimes… Haven’t forgotten the soap in the dishwasher… yet 🙂
All right, I’ve figured out a system for the hair washing delimma. After using the shampoo, I leave the lid up. After using the conditioner I leave the lid up. When finished put them down again and start over the next day. Appointments or anything else I must remember go in huge block letters on a large piece of paper stuck to the pantry door – GET GAS etc. Glad it’s not just me.
Great system!! I’ll have to try that… if I remember 🙂
It seems everyone has these little slips, it’s nice to know we’re not alone!
Yes, I’ve been there many times and can empathise with you completely. Nice post: now I just need to follow you before I forgot where I read this.
Ha! So true. It was a fun post to write. I think my husband was like, why am I taking all these weird pictures of you?
http://msudlj.com/2013/08/16/her-memory-has-escaped-please-help/
DJ
I hate to frighten someone younger than me…yeah, that’s a lie…but this is just the tip of the…..ummmmm, wtf is that thing called…..just kidding. I know it’s a Popsicle. What was I saying? Oh, yeah, you’ll be doing this for years, and it will get a lot worse before it gets better. In fact, you’ll get a hint that things may be looking back up, verbal-wise, when things start looking way down, skin tissue-wise. Yep. Sorry. The worst part is, alcohol in no way helps either issue.
Ha! Hilarious reply. It does sadden me though, because I was a hoping a nice glass of wine would be my cure…
Yeah, I’d drink the wine anyway.
Thanks!!!
That was such a comforting post. I was beginning to get seriously worried about my inability to remember…what was it now? Erm, yes, stuff.
He he. I know. That, uh, stuff can be hard to keep track of!
Where would we be without google?
Oh, that’s right… accomplishing things and publishing novels. Woops.
But there would be so many mispellings of “hello” floating around out there.
Google is amazing. Remember actually having to go the library for research? Or using a phone book? Or a paper map? Crazy.
The number of possible misspellings is probably infinite. I’m sure Google has some data we can look up 🙂
Thanks for coming by!
Oh, technology.. I’m about to go to NYC for the 4th time– but this is the first time that they have all these fancy apps that tell me how to navigate the subway system. I’m like… REALLY?! Where was this when I was 18 and wandering around like a runaway?